Same old, same old situation, same old, same old song & dance!

Tue, 26 May 2009 19:55:07 GMT

I'm fat. I have not excepted it. I'm a 130lb women in a 198lb woman's body. I'm going to do it this time and lose the weight. It's a life style change and one that I can do. I'm tired of crying about being fat. I want to lose the weight. I want to be happy. I want to be healthy. I want to be super fast again. I want to be a great bike rider that I know I can be, not one who huffs and puffs. I want to be muscular. I want to have a flat belly. I want to eat healthy and still have one snack, not six. I want to quit drinking, I drink socially, weekends only, this is still a problem, this is what is ruining my weight loss. I know it is. I party. I am a party girl. I want to quit. Cold Turkey. I want this not to be a problem anymore.
I want to be a better mother to my children. I want them to look at me without disgust at being fat.
I want it so bad.

Thanks for a great community!

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 11:49:11 GMT

Dear WW Friends,

I know I don't post much or comment much. But I do read and I want to say thank you to all of you for your support. YOU women inspire me and that is what is making me stick to WW! I know I am not alone and some of you mirror my questions, thoughts and concerns. You are wise, witty, funny, smart and a very interesting group! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
Keep up the good work ladies, I know some days are harder than others but with the will and the drive we will all reach our goals!

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 12:32:10 GMT

So it's been a bit crazy in my life right now, but here are my stats that I was supposed to post last week.
CW: 185.5
GW: 140
My work it cut out for me. I'm following the flex plan pretty good and I'll weigh in on Thursday morning. My only downfall was Monday night. Me and the hubby went to see Ronnie James Dio & Judas Priest and I had a couple of drinks. (If you are an old school metal head, I suggest you see this concert! It rocked heavy!)
I used my flex points so it all worked out. I'm going to take a nice bike ride with my 2 year old today since it's not hot & humid. That's always a good workout for me!
:)

I'm here to stay!

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 19:22:26 GMT

So I'm back. AGAIN. And this time it's for good! I'm back on track starting tomorrow!
I told myself that when my 14 year old daughter makes the volleyball team today, then I'm going to bust ass just like she is to lose the weight. I can't go back on my word to her and it would be wrong to do so.
Maybe that's what I needed to do was to tell HER that I am going to do WW and to lose this weight. She is behind me 100% and she said, "Mom if I can make the volleyball team, you can lose weight, because you had the confidence that I would make the team and now I'm telling you that I have the confidence that you can lose the weight!" Now is that a great kid or what?
So there in no letting myself or her down!
So here's to me! YAY!
I'm going to start my workout program tonight, hit the grocery store tomorrow and get to it!
I'm in a good place and this is where I need to be!
Fat Stats Tomorrow!

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 12:54:19 GMT

Yesterday was my son's 2nd birthday! I had a 5 point piece of b-day cake and stayed within my 25 points range! Go me!
I'm going to a "chick" party tonight at my neighbor's house. She is a fantastic cook along with specializing in pastrys. Damn. I'm going to eat before I go, then choose a small desert wisely and have ONE glass of wine.
That's it. I know I'll have to force myself to come home, but thats ok, we as a family are going to a bar-b-que tomorrow and want to kick back and have a couple of guilt free beers while hanging out.

One of my neighbors last night told me I was looking really good. Hmmm, well I thanked her and thought, maybe they can see it, but I can't. Hard work will pay off in the long run, I know it.

Happy Friday WW friends. Have a great weekend and stay on track. It's a struggle, I know, but I'm determined to do it myself!

ww pda points counter

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:45:40 GMT

Does anyone out there have a pda?
I track all of my ww points on a pda. My pda is an old Zire 21 Palm Pilot (2004 model year) and this is the only thing I use it for now is tracking my points.
I have mac based computer so only those of you who use a mac can use this program.
Unless your a computer GOD and know how to convert files to make it work on a pc.
It's a great program! It saves all of your food entries, tracks points, calculates points and lets you calculate activity points too! You set it to your points range and go from there!
You have to figure out how to use it all on your own as there are no instructions. But if you have any questions one the files are uploaded, I will do my best to answer any questions you might have. It really is pretty easy to use!
So if your are interested in this program and you want me to send the files to you,
please email me: jlbell620@yahoo.com
subject line: ww pda files

Jenny :)

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 13:49:33 GMT

Well, here I am again. I suck at this, but I'm trying not to say that to much to myself.
Why do I not have any control over my eating habits? Oh, because I'm lazy and I don't want to. Yes, that's right. This is the only place where I can spout off and get it off my chest. I know i can do this. I know I can.
I just need to get back on the wagon. AGAIN.
I will get back on the scale tomorrow morning and see what kind of damage I have done. I have not been following at all since I went to the Motley Crue show last Tuesday night. By the way, they were fantastic if you love 80's rock-n-roll!
I need to stop whining and start doing. I need to stop feeling sorry for my fat ass and just do it. Do something about this weight that I have gained over the years. And as we all know, WE are the only ones who can control what we put into our mouths. Well this is what I need to do. I need to be in control, always. I need to get to the grocery store at some point today. My hubby will be home from his biker trip, so that will help me some. I have missed him and so have the kids, but I understand that he, like most needed to get away and do what they love, and his passion happens to be motorcycles.
I used to be that hot chick on the back of the bike, now I'm glad I can just get my friggin leg over the seat. WTF? This to is something that bothers me, and I'm sure bothers my hubby, but he would never say it to my face. I can't even where my chaps anymore or my cute little leather vest. Yes, it is little too. God forbid I go out and buy a whole cow to cover up my ass. I have only been on one ride this summer and that was enough for me.
I know this post is a big whine fest, but it's my post, and dammit I'm whining!
My Mom told me once that you need to do something everyday that you do not like to do. Example: cleaning, laundry, ect., well why not what eat healthy? It's obvious I don't like to do it, so that should be my ONE thing everyday. Sounds like a good plan to me.
Thanks for listening.

Weigh in!

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 23:55:25 GMT

Hello World!
Well I finally got my fat ass on the scale this morning. Here are my stats:

CW: 186.5
GW: 140.0
HT: 5'4"
Am I forgetting anything?

I have been lurking in the _Weight Watchers & Dieting Support communities and I have to say that I have come across some really great, inspiring people! Thanks!

There is hope for me! I'm going for it and I will do it this time. I hate being round, so I know that I am the only one who can fix this problem!
I know there is no easy way to do this, just lots of hard work! I'm ready.

Time to go for a bike ride!

New Here!

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 13:22:33 GMT

The main reason which prevents people from losing weight is ENDLESS procrastination.
Most people tell themselves that they'll begin dieting "next week" or "after some future holiday" (or some other excuse) -- and that let's them procrastinate even further.
::The Truth::
The truth is that it doesn't matter what month it is.
And it doesn't matter what time of year it is either..since it's foolish to wait until a particular month to get healthy and slimmer.
Why would you want to remain overweight until some future "month" or "time of year"?
(borrowed from Fat Loss for Idiots)

Hi,
I'm new here and this is exactly how I feel. I run this through my head every day. Why? Because I am exactly what that little paragraph says. I do this ALL THE TIME. I'm still doing it.
I created this journal to hopefully find the support I need and to get serious about losing the 60lbs I need to get rid of since giving birth to my 3rd "surprise" baby at the age of 39. He is a gift from God and I'm am so happy that he is in our lives. He completes our little family! :)
I just celebrated the 20th anniversary of my 21st birthday last Friday and I told myself that "after" my birthday, I would jump on the band wagon and change my life style, blah, blah, blah. Ok, so I haven't started yet. But here I go again on the procrastination wagon. Next week is my husbands birthday, then the next day is the 4th of July and on top of that I'll be up north. God forbid I start dieting before the festivities begin!!! Oh and let's not forget the Bon Jovi concert the first week of July and the Motley Crue concert coming up in the middle of July and the Poison concert in August.
Wait, it's not dieting, it's a life style change. I know.
I'm just so disappointed in myself that it's making me crazy. I had my first 2 children at 26 & 28 and had no problem whipping myself back into shape and making healthy eating choices and not partying every weekend. I was in control and have the pictures to prove it.
I have been successful on Weight Watchers. I know the point system like the back of my hand. I just do not have the will power to do it. I'll start, then stop, start, then stop. It's a never ending cycle.
Shit.
I need this to end and to take control of my life and lifestyle. I know I'm not the only one out there who feels like this. I hate talking about my weight with anyone. I know that people who have not seen me in a while are like, "holy crap, what happened to her"? It is a pretty crappy feeling for one who used to be in great shape. I beat myself up everyday, but I can't seem to stop the binging cycle of eating whatever I want, whenever and not exercising like I should.
I'm tired all the time. Have a wonderful relationship with my couch and tv. I have NO LOVE LIFE what-so-ever and I think that is having a slight effect on my relationship with my husband. I feel so unattractive it's retarded. I know I shouldn't. He loves me any shape I am, but I just feel so disgusting naked. Yuck.
I need to change. I need some help. But God forbid I pay to get it and fail miserably again.
I want to do this on my own. I need to do this on my own. I have the tools and the knowledge. I just have no drive. None. Period.
Thank you for listening. I know I'll make some new friends here. I need some.

jb